My classic middle child- you are. You woke me up at 4:15 am just so I would look for your slipper. You were sobbing and I did not melt. I put you to bed. I told you to stop being selfish- like any 4 year old really understands that. I was so tired but managed to make peanut butter brownies, a spinach salad, and roasted potatoes for the church's potluck before you woke up today. I left the kitchen a disastrous mess so that you and your sisters could get some spiritual training while I spent the whole of Sunday service trying to calm down your little sister who wanted another little girl's goldfish crackers. I tried to watch you closely today. I wanted to see who were and who you will become, but it was a church potluck day which means to you "I will play with my friends" day. I am so glad to see you with your friends playing marbles, laughing when you are "surfing", and holding hands. You are so smart and you would much rather play than eat, but like a good mom I try to get you to eat some more of your meatballs before you run back to your friends. Since you disobeyed I told you that you could not have dessert and you happily said, "Okay!" Did it back fire on me? Maybe But I am no supermom. I am just mom. I want to help you grow. I want to see you close up. I want hug you and tell you that your blankie will be okay if it spends the day getting washed. But you completely disagree with me and spend the entire time screaming.
After church we come home and mommy is desperate for a nap. You and your older sister argue about whether you should watch Dora or Word World and all I want is quiet. I thank God that all of you are quiet for a good hour and a half. I might have missed some time to spend with you, but I promise I will be a much better mommy after I take a nap. After too many movies and shows you say, "Peanut butter and honey sandwich for dinner please!?!" Since Sundays daddy is at work that is fine with me because mommy was going to just drink a green smoothie for dinner and hope that will magically start her on the path to weight loss. I hear you laugh and play. I take your picture to capture a close up. A close up of my daughter who is fun, impish, artistic, friendly and mostly easy going until you loose your favorite thing.
I am so privileged to see you close up- to see you every day and teach you preschool at home. That is my favorite close up time with you. I thank God for this time and can feel it quickly fading away. God, You made me a mom and I have a special daughter that You see even closer than I do. Please keep her safe and soften her heart to obedience. She will one day not be so close up.
No comments:
Post a Comment