The Ministry of Motherhood My Personal Study Part 2

This is how we mother!  We are kind, but not soft.  Unlike God we will never be perfect but isn't it amazing?  We get to show our children what God is like.  As mothers, we specifically can show grace when those little eyes look at us and say, "Sorry, Mom."  We don't keep bring up all the things they do wrong.  I am so guilty of this so I have a lot of learning to do!

Peter, one of Jesus' top disciples, denied he even knew Him, yet in I Peter 4:8 we see how Peter recognizes that love covers a multitude of sins.  Christ gave grace to Peter.  I want to extend that kind of grace to my own children.  What does that look like?  I can tell you what it DOES NOT look like.  It doesn't look like cussing out your kids, embarrassing/shaming them, spanking multiple times a week (spanking is a last resort under certain circumstances at our house), or screaming at them.  Grace, in our every day interaction, is knowing your child and making clear what is expected of them.  It is listening.  It is realizing that every situation you encounter will not be the same and will not requite the exact same punishment or possibly any punishment.  It is being a mom constantly seeking wisdom in prayer.

Jesus' attitude to His disciples before going to the cross was of concern, sorrow, and radical love.  He called them "my children".  The scene from John 13:31-14:1 becomes somewhat reminiscent of a parent leaving their child on the first day of school or college.  "I can not go with you....(but) trust God."  Jesus knew they were going to make mistakes and sin, maybe even HUGE mistakes and sins, even though there is no gradation on sin, but He was prepared to love them and forgive them.  That is what I, as a mother, need to be prepared to do.  My children are sinners and will continue to sin.  I want to be prepared to show them love while not approving of the sin.  I want to show grace and show them God's forgiveness through me.  I will read to them about the great heroes of the Bible who messed up big time and tell them it is never too late to come home and come before the church and throne of God for repentance.

Jesus also clearly teaches that discipline is a tool to be worked with along side grace.  But how does that work?  How do we put those things together when they almost seem like opposites?  Well to be honest- I don't know the answer and it is part of the reason I am reading this book.  For me, it comes down to trusting that God will help you make the right decisions.  It sound simple at first but it become so much more.

From the questions on page 57 of The Ministry of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson.  Stay tuned for next week to find what irritates me about my kids and how I try to respond in grace, but more often then not- fail.  I know you want to know!   

FAMILY UPDATE:  
Lucy was throwing up last week and then I was sleep deprived and also felt my stomach not being happy with me.  I didn't get my usual week homemaking update but life goes on.  We are all much better now!

A Gift in a Box, a Bag, a Book

What a gift to remember and find our wedding photos on a disc in a box!?!  I totally forgot where this was till I looked in my closet.  The things you find in the back of the closet- it could be a treasure. 

I have reached a point where I would pay someone to decorate the bare walls of my house.  But I did find some cute things to hang up so here is hoping I can do this myself.  Gift to myself- decor from the YAM silent auction.

So many gifts inside books- words, knowledge, fun, mystery, book markers, and my children's nose in one just to name a few.  Hermione has just started the second book and we have started a small literary tea after church so we get to talk.  It is so fun to see how much she loves these books.  I didn't even MAKE her read them.  She just says she loves them so much!!  Plus if you know me- I LOVE book markers.  In the hard bound book it is hard to see are two book markers- one with a tassel and one was Mother's Day present from this year.  Books are gifts themselves- I think it is time for me to reread this one.  

Happy National Chocolate Chip Day

Today is the first time our group is meeting for Hospitality In Practice and since it is also Chocolate Chip Day what better time to try a new recipe.  This post is mouth watering.  Behold this Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Cheesecake-

I used a Taste of Home recipe.  I haven't tasted it yet but I have high expectations.  Plus I think it will be the last dessert I eat for the year!  I hope you all eat some chocolate chip goodness today.  See you next week if not sooner- stay tuned for my personal study on the Ministry of Motherhood. 

The Ministry of Motherhood: My Personal Study Part 1

Right now I am reading The Ministry of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson.  If I were a teacher or a leader I would love to do this as a six or seven week study at my church.  There are not many young moms at my church plus I know so many others more qualified than myself to teach a Bible study or Sunday school class, but if I were to have to opportunity I would like to be prepared so here I am.  I am doing my own personal study.  It is going to be casual.  It is going to be when I get around to it.  I am never guaranteed my time, but I will do my very best to update my progress on this study once a week on Tuesdays.  I must warn you- this is a library book.  I might have to return it before I am able to finish not for lack of trying.

Coming off of Mother's Day weekend it is a great time to think on God's given role of motherhood.  God made mothers to reflect a facet of His own character.  He does this with fathers as well, but that is a different facet and it can't be denied that the role of mom is unique.  We carry our children inside of our bodies.  It still trips me out a little.  Then they are birthed THROUGH our bodies with some (okay, maybe a LOT) of pain and struggle.  Even our precious adoptive babies are usually not "delivered" pain and struggle free.  Moms have the ability to feed babies with their bodies- how amazing is that!  I ache for those who were not able to experience this but YOU are not less of a mother and you shouldn't be made to feel that way.  I pray I am sensitive to all who experience motherhood through different ways be it adoption, foster care, and being a mom/role model to those who you did not physically birth.  No matter how you became a mom, you are different from a father.  God has given you things that only you can do.

Isn't it an amazing privilege to be called to this ministry?  Yes!  That is what motherhood is- a ministry.  Now that I am a Youth Pastor's wife I often think of ministry in the confines of a church building.  It is something that involves meetings and committees and regulations.  With motherhood there isn't a whole lot of that- for some that may be a good thing for others they might think well what am I suppose to do all day?  Moms get up in the middle of the night for feedings or to soothe night terrors.  Moms get sassy mouths and too many spills to count.  We get potty training, laundry, and correcting behavior.  But we also get hugs, high-fives, cuddles and "I love yous" from little ones.  We get bed times and story times.  I was blessed by one of my daughter's who wrote me a song for Mother's Day.

So much of this looks like normal things- just every day nothing special- bad and good alike, but if you believe that motherhood is a ministry it makes every single day an opportunity to share the gospel and reflect the love and grace God gives us.  It changes the way I do mothering.  I hope it does for you too if you believe this.

Psalm 127:3 ESV Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward.

Psalm 127:3 ICB Children are a gift from the Lord.  Babies are a reward. 

Psalm 127:3 The Message Don’t you see that children are God’s best gift?
    the fruit of the womb his generous legacy?

Psalm 127:3 KJV  Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.


What does this verse imply about the ministry of motherhood?  It does NOT imply that if you are infertile that you are less of a woman/person.  But it does imply that children are gifts to be treasured and cared for.  Children are a legacy, a heritage.  They will carry on what we have taught them.  Let it not be done lightly.

This was written with the help of prompts from the questions on pg 19.  I hope to join you again next week as we discover the ministry of motherhood.    
  
 PERSONAL NOTE AND UPDATE:

I bet you thought I forgot about my weekly entry, but I didn't.  Actually on the contrary I just couldn't focus.  There was SO much I wanted to write and share and say.  So in my crazy quirky way that I am, I tried to come up with a system to help me while keeping up with normal everyday things.  As far as homemaking goes it really does encompass many things.  Since this is more of a journal than for business or necessarily encouragement for others (though I hope from time to time it does!) I narrowed down my homemaking style to 7 Cs:  Church/Christ, Cooking, Crafting, Cultivating (I know I am stretching a little on that one aka Gardening), Company, Children/Chivalry (also a stretch, trying to update on my relationship with my husband), and Choice (this would include anything new that doesn't fit any of the other categories).  I thought maybe I could keep it simple to update just one or two of these categories a week so as not to feel overwhelmed when writing out an entry since I don't get to updated every day.  Maybe that doesn't even make any sense, maybe it won't even work, I don't know.  I am just trying to narrow down my thoughts.

It is about what I can do, not about what I can't do...or it all started after Jonathan Crombie died

It was two weeks of hanging on, jealousy, anxiety, anger, and a little bit of sorrow.  I have been having some financial disappointments and dealing with more boring grown up stuff.  But now there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  This week found me reflecting on why my previous two weeks that were not so great and not filled with the joy of homemaking.  Much of it stems from wanting to do things I can't afford.  I am struggling with contentment and a little bit of resentment.  So I decided to think long and hard about the things I CAN do.  Here is a list of 7 things I can do with very little or no cost.  

1.  Pray-  If I learned anything during Lent it is that prayer changes my whole day especially if I can pray for others and not myself.  Operation World has a wonderful prayer calendar to take the focus off of myself and on to God, the gospel, and the World.  I am going to do this for 15 min. every day while waiting for my tea to boil.  I can also teach my children to pray.  In this area I have been very weak.  My girls don't seem to know how to pray and that makes me sad.  I don't have much knowledge or resources in this area but I am hoping I get better at this.

2.  Sing with a Smile-  When I realized how horrible and worried I had been over the past couple of weeks and finally had a burden lifted from my shoulders, it had felt like I hadn't truly smiled or sang with my whole heart.  I think we can all agree this is a wonderful habit to retrain ourselves in especially when we don't always feel like it.  So if you see me with a silly grin on my face it is because- it is FREE and JOY comes in the morning.  I love to sing.  I love to smile.  I feel like those have been missing because I let stress and resentment rule.  I am sure things will come and try to steal my joy again, but I will just remember after a little while how good God is and I don't have to be exactly like so and so.

3. Read-  After I finally caught up with my reading schedule my next book took so long to come from the library that I took a reading break.  I am so excited to get back in to it.  I also realized that I am not really sticking very well to my goal this year in the reading department.  I am not actually reading any homemaking books!!!  All my books are Christian non-fiction except for the very first one and the C.S. Lewis one. Yes, I guess I just realized that so that makes me slow, but also the Christian homemaking books can be harder to find from the library.  But reading is indeed fairly free, especially if you have a library close by.  Ours is in another town so we do have to pay a little bit, but for a reader like myself it is so worth it.  I think I am going to have stick to with homemaking goals for at least another year just so I can read more on this reading lists I found recently- HERE


 4.  Garden-  I should be working here more often any way.  It did seem to take a lot of money to get it started, but there is a lot of work I could be doing that doesn't require cost.  There is weeding and pruning and vine training.  I could also work on sowing seeds.  I need to be out there at least 1 hour a day.

5.  Writing-  This might not be my gifted area but I certainly enjoy it.  I would like to write more about my devotions and possibly more reviews.  I don't write much fiction, but I haven't ruled it out as an activity.  My mom has wanted to put more family stories on paper which would be fun.  I would have to jog my memory for that big a project but it would certainly be worth it.

6.   Finishing my Cross-stitch-  It is too bad that this isn't finished.  I should pick up a sewing hoop from... I am sure some one at church has one.  It is hard to say when it will be done and I think it might be one quarter done.  I need to perfect my French Knot.  All I know for sure is I can work harder on this one.  Plus I keep forgetting how relaxing it is once I get going. 

7.  Watch Period Movies I Have Been Meaning to Watch-  With the passing of Jonathan Crombie aka Gilbert Blithe from the Anne of Green Gables and my first crush, I have been wanting to do an Anne movie marathon plus make a list of at least 12 different movies I want to see that I haven't.  I found a great list at the blog Strangers and Pilgrims on Earth.  I have always loved period movies, but I have not watched as many as I wanted for a variety of reasons that I am just like- ENOUGH- I want to do this and I can get pretty much all these movies from the library or Netflix. 

*BONUS 8.  Chores/House work- alright, alright, alright, I do this one every day, but I could always do better especially when it comes to laundry and the garage.  It would be great to get those two things in more order.  I didn't want to add this one but I know I should.

FAMILY UPDATE

We celebrated Uncle Mack's birthday.  Here are some fun pictures- although I only got one picture of the birthday boy- sorry!  Love spring and cousin time! 

 PRESCHOOL FUN

Insert Big Breath and Let it Out Slowly

Between my oldest having some emotional problems at school (I have been called to pick her up for three school days in a row), the Internet being a little sketchy, having zero energy to deal with all the complaining, breaking the slow cooker, no concrete budget, and the car making a funny noise my anxiety levels have hit the limit.  This was just a week where I had to concentrate on me and my grown up responsibilities.  I ignored all the fighting, complaining, and mess.  I can't explain it exactly but I couldn't waste my energy or expectations on the kids or others for that matter. 

So I don't have any fun pictures this week and if I said the things I was thinking I would be in big trouble.  I keep taking deep breaths, trying to do one small thing at a time, not get discouraged, and cry out to God no matter how horrible I feel.  I can push through this set back.  I have a lot encouragement from other moms, blogs, and my husband. 

If you want to know what I DID do this week, it is a little more encouraging then it would at first appear.  I watched The Book Thief which I absolutely LOVED.  I cross stitched for about 2 hours.  I kept the kitchen clean.  I cleaned out the fridge.  I read the Bible at breakfast and dinner to the kids and I didn't care if they were listening or not, but I did it.  And  my three year old called me beautiful and  put her hands on my face and said, "Aren't you so proud of me?  I can go potty by myself, ride my bike, and swing!!!"  Now I know it was worth it.   

Easter- A week of Finishing and New Beginnings

Lententide is over but Easter has just begun.  It is slightly bitter sweet but also I feel very accomplished.  I finished my photo project, two books, and renewed my prayer life.  What grace I was able to receive!  I messed up- a lot.  There were many days when I wondered why I was even trying and why I had tried to make such a tough commitment.  I feel like I am better prepared for next year though.  Meals were a big, tough problem.  It was a much bigger problem then it should have been.  The sugar fast was kind of all over place.  I had too many health problems.  I was so selfish about my detox during spring break I let the housework go, which was very bad for my mental and spiritual health.

Darkness-

Hallelujah- 

  


Easter was exhausting fun.  Ariana said it was the best Easter ever!  Grandma helped get the girls ready for Resurrection Sunday.  I try to get them some new dresses every year, but this year it seemed a bit redundant because we had so many beautiful hand me downs.  Lucy got a new dress and a new hat.  I actually didn't feel bad about breaking my neck to set out fancy Easter baskets full of gifts for the girls.  We eat too much candy and my girls don't "really" need anything any way.  Turned out great because Grandma bought them plenty of gifts.  I was tired, but I am pretty much tired all the time- life of a mom I guess.

Easter Sunday Best

 

Egg Hunt Ready

Emerson

Malachi

Found one!

Ariana

Iris

Hermione

Ruby

Now is the beginnings part of my post!  I started a new devotional- The Heart of Praise.  I am looking forward to reading the Psalms.  I wish I had someone to share the journey with, but as with most things at my time in life is not allowing me much interaction with others.  Everyone is already so busy and I can't think of anyone willing to come a long with me.  Guess I am feeling a little sorry for myself- another thing to add to my prayer life.  I began a big chunk of gardening.  That felt great.  I am hoping for a good return on my investment.  It is hard to beat fresh tomatoes with basil pesto.  I put in some broccoli, blueberry bushes, beans, strawberries, lettuce, and some carrot seeds.  There is still so much to do!  God has been doing wonders with the weather.  I am a wimp when it comes to gardening in the rain and in Oregon specifically in the Willamette Valley this can be a real problem.  It has been sunny at all the right times and rained at all the right times.  Praise God! 

There isn't going to much of a break for me this month.  I was surprised to not have to baby-sit today because my charge is sick, but it was nice to have a break and get a nap.  Because of the gardening Lucy and I have been taking a preschool break, but I think we will do preschool on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  I have no idea what else is in store, but hoping for direction soon.