Advent Day 12- Holiday #TBT

"I think there must be something wrong with me, Linus.  Christmas is coming, but I'm not happy.  I don't feel the way I am suppose to feel."  -Charlie Brown

One of my favorite things to do around this time of year is to just remember the past.  I have been consciously celebrating Advent for only about 4 years.  We have done many variations with the help of Focus on the Family who publish a free guide and calendar every year so far and with the book Before and After Christmas.  Unfortunately every year we are behind or don't even get to do half the activities because almost every night we are busy with choir practices, school performances, parties, and just plain anxiety from shopping (the last one is just me).  But I am never going to give up trying to slow down and reflect and write about how Advent is going no matter how often it feels like a failure.  Here are a list of past Advent/Christmas time woes and the humility it brought to the season:

2017- I was diagnosed with bronchitis and our washing machine smelled of burning rubber.  I was literally forced by my health to slow down and rest.  I was able to graciously ask for help and accept it from a friend who offered us a washing machine free of charge.  I really clung to the word HOPE that things would get better.  I never officially finished Advent that year.  

2016- It snowed much more than normal.  It tested my patience with the kids and the many school delays.  Also this was the year the dryer was screeching like a banshee and I learned how to replace the wheels and belt by myself.  I learned even more patience and confidence to do something I might never had attempted in the past.  

2015- The first time I participated in Busted Halo's Advent Photo Challenge and became very distracted because Star Wars: The Force Awakens came out.  I started off that season with a cold and over bought on presents.  I learned to be a little less snarky and plan a little better (still ever working on that!)  

A couple of other things during this season before I was very conscious about Advent were-the tornado in Aumsville the year we moved into the parsonage 2010,  Lucy's birth story (shadowed by a horrible event that led to the arrest of someone our family had known personally for years) 2011, and the year the car died 2013 just to name a few.  

So as not to end on such a downer note here a few favorite pictures from past Advents and general past Christmas time pictures in no particular order:

#TBT 2016

# TBT 2017

#TBT 2016

Advent Day 11- Seasonal Treats

"Preparation, I have often said, is rightly two-thirds of any venture." -Amelia Earhart

Christmas is a great time to indulge.  I have been trying to keep it simple, but I have been trying to eat a good breakfast at the very least.  I didn't make anything fancy and I don't have baking day planned, but my husband bought some really delicious Christmas chocolates as gifts for some helpers.  The most important thing for me today was to get the kitchen clean which I actually completed.  It just seemed like an impossible task after all the partying and cooking breakfast every morning.  I am not the regular cleaning type and can be quite lazy much of the time so I am proud of myself.  I rewarded myself by celebrating my own personal Saint Lucia's Day Feast with Swedish pancakes and a Saint Lucy bun and a cup of strong coffee.  

I got some star cookies for the girls to come home to even if they aren't from scratch I am glad to kick start my birthday/anniversary week!  

Advent Day 10- Hope

"We should live our lives as though Christ was coming this afternoon." -Former President Jimmy Carter

What a very cheery Christmas time!  I spent the day writing some Advent reflections and posting some pictures on Facebook while rewatching Downton Abbey because  I it has a couple of great Christmas episodes.  But during the evening we went to a family get together and had dinner with cousins and new friends and little ones.  

I took lots of pictures and ate some delicious foods.  The kids opened presents.  It was nice.  

Hanging out.

They don't do much rocking around the Christmas tree here!

Callie and Adore- super cuties!

With all the little children around I did really take some time to think about hope.  Hope for the future.  Hope to teach the young ones about Jesus.  Hope that they will grow up to continue to teach others and future generations. 

Patience!

New weapon- I mean present.

Earrings are adorable!

Hello, new friends!

Hello!

Advent Day 9- Christmas Socks (in my case Christmas stockings)

"When we love, we always strive to become better than we are.  When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too." -Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

Yesterday, I got to slow down.  I just sat, watched TV, and folded laundry.  I didn't stress.  I didn't worry.  I let myself be.  That was truly a gift.  Tonight we will be going to a Christmas get together at my father-in-law and Kori's house with his family of my husband's little half-sisters who are one and three.   I have hope for a nice night.  

Advent Day 8- Gathering

"There are two ways of spreading light-- to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it." -Edith Wharton

We have had at least 3 main gatherings for Christmas already.  Our church Christmas party, Lucy's birthday party, and special choir/children's Christmas program are the specifics.  It has all been good fun.  Neil decorated our table Star Wars style.  Lucy's birthday was full of friends and cousins and emojis.  She is now seven and still a handful.   The choir sang a Candlelight Processional, Silver Bells, and The Twelve Days of Christmas.  

Advent Day 7- Devotion

"Among creatures, no one knows Christ better than Mary; no one can introduce us to a profound knowledge of his mystery better than his Mother." -St. John Paul II

Growing up Mary has been more a mystery then someone I should show any devotion to, but as I have learned and grown in my faith I have begun to recognize the reverence to the Holy Family.  It is not the intensity of worship and equality with God, but they do deserve our piety and affection.  

Unfortunately, I was unable to give them the devotion they were due, but I took the time to listen to the Ave Maria and simple thought reflection.  Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us.  

Advent Day 6- Fave Christmas Movie and Christmas Sweaters

"There's something about a Christmas sweater that will always make me laugh." -Kristen Wiig

Christmas sweaters are great and hilarious!  My oldest has been wearing hers every day since December started.  We finished up our church Christmas party and pulled out the Christmas movies, but sadly haven't had time to watch any yet.  But they are a comfort.  Excited time of year!

Advent Day 5- Candy Cane

"Think and imagine a world when love is the way...Because when love is the way, we actually treat each other like we are family.  When love is the way, we know that God is the source of us all." -The Most Rev. Michael B. Curry, Episcopal Church

Right before the coast down the hill to Christmas I don't have as much time to be generous or loving because I am often rushing around getting ready for my youngest child's birthday party.  At least I don't feel exceptionally loving with a moody, grumpy newly seven year-old who thinks that if I wake her without her waking up first is the most tragic and scream worthy time.  But I have kept my voice steady and even.  I have surely tried to be a loving mom.  

Lucy was born on December 6, 2011.  She was the baby everyone warned me about.  She has a stubborn streak and also a loving nature but it is usually a guess as to which one I will meet at any given hour of day.  But we do know this about her.  Her favorite color is yellow.  When she lit up from seeing the yellow candy canes on St. Nicholas Day, it made me soften up.  Christmas- the time when we try to give extra joy and cheer and love to family, friends, and even ourselves. 

Advent Day 4- Waiting

"Patience is not simply the ability to wait-- it's how we behave while we're waiting." -Joyce Meyer, author

I don't mind the waiting for Christmas.  It is the shopping and pressure of gift giving and keeping the house clean that makes me crazy.  But even when I know it is coming I keep having a couple of freak outs.  I have not been behaving well lately.

This is just a nice reminder to slow down.  That is exactly what I will be doing this coming week.

We waited for Saint Nicholas this year for the first time.  I am glad to finally get a tiny bit on time for this Christmas season. 

Advent Day 3- My Prayer

"Well I know I had it all on the line

But don't just sit with folded hands and become blind

'Cause even when there is no star in sight

You'll always be my only guiding light."

-Mumford & Sons, "Guiding Light"

Dear Lord Jesus Christ,

You have given us Yourself.  You are our guiding light.  When I am stressed because I have had my expectations dashed, let me look to the light.  When I reach the bottom of my bank account, let me look to the light.  When the dark night of winter closes in around me, let me look to the light.  When fear of illness rears its ugly head, let me look to the light.  This is my simple prayer for this Advent season.  I pray for the worry, fear, and stress to be burned away by the light of the candle and the salvation You bring because You are the light of the world.  

Amen

We are about to entering the biggest hump before rushing down the hill toward Christmas.  I already had about 3 freak outs- you can ask my husband.  There are lots of reasons the Christmas season doesn't bring out my best, but Advent is the time I cling to get to through the rough time.  I keep letting stupid things get to me: will they like this gift? why don't we have enough money? did I waste money?  why does everything get lost or broken?  It just all rambles and rattles inside of my head until I am weary.  So I sit here.  I take a deep breathe and pray.  I give these feelings to someone who can handle them.  I hope you don't have to do that.  You are probably much more organized and on top of things than I am.  But in case your not- then I encourage you to pray. 

Advent Day 2- Advent Calendar

"Mark the season of Advent by loving and serving others with God's own love and concern." -St. Teresa of Calcutta

We don't usually have a regular Advent Calendar with the little chocolates or doors but we do have this snowman who helps us keep track.  So far he has made it through all our family Christmases and I don't even remember where he came from but we are so glad he hasn't torn or gotten excessively dirty which seems to happen to all our ornaments or decorations.  

I did decide to try and pair our Advent theme this year with some simple ornaments to put on a little tree before we put up our Christmas tree.  I still haven't found all the spare hooks but I am sure they will turn up and if they don't to the Dollar Tree I go.  I have attempted a Jesse Tree in the past but for whatever reason it hasn't really worked out even though I am sure I have made the ornaments and I am waiting to see if those will show up while I am cleaning and searching through the Christmas boxes- you can see how organized I am- hahahaha!  

We have just started so we haven't actually completed a project yet but we have the prompts ready for the week.  I am not expecting some revelation of love and goodwill between my girls- in fact I am expecting grumbling and complaining but maybe I will be surprised.  I will try go keep you posted as to what will happen with these if any thing.  I might forget- that would be the most likely scenario.  

Any way, we try right?  I am glad to have this extra time to sleep in today and "try" to put my kitchen back together.  Happy Adventide! 

Advent Day 1- Candle

"Optimism and hope are radically different attitudes.  Optimism is the expectation that things-- the weather, human relationship, the economy, the political situation, and so on--will get better.  Hope is trust that God will fulfill God's promises to us in a way that leads us to true freedom." -Henri Nouwen

Advent- that precious time of waiting in expectation.  It has arrived and I am in such need of this stillness, this patience, and especially the first week of hope.  I may not always have everything planned and ready to go.  I may still bug out and go into temporary shock when I see how much money we spend during this season, but I have the Advent candles waiting for me at the end of the day.  It is the most calming and reflective feeling to gather around the table, light the candle, and just open the Word.  

This year our Advent focus is Knowing Him by Name and it will be beautiful.  I am looking forward to talks and coloring with the girls.  The devotional also gives us some prompts on how to serve during Advent.  I can't wait to share with all of you how the journey will culminate.  

I pray you too will have a wonderful Advent season.  I promise I wouldn't try to over do it and I will try my super hard to stay healthy this time. 

Challenge 78 Take Two

Well I guess the challenge was kind of a bust for October.  I have been too tired in the evening to write.  I guess I should just do this in the morning or as soon as I can instead of thinking I will be ready to write at night.  My age is catching up to me.  Time to start going to bed at 9:00.  Which gives me my first negative thought

-Negative Thought: 
I am getting too old to stay up past eleven.  I feel tired all day.

+Positive Thought:
This gives me the opportunity to try to be more disciplined.
I understand the value of sleep. 
It is time to change my old habits. 
It will give me a reason to get into my comfy bed and pjs. 
Time to communicate with my husband.

-Negative Thought
I am really overwhelmed at the moment. 

+Positive Thought
Time to put my trust and faith into God's hands- not that I wasn't already but I certainly am learning this lesson.
It gives me the opportunity to reorganize and get better at planning my day.
Maybe it is time to ask for more help
Take some deep breaths
Time to go back to meditating

Challenge 78 Write Down Negative Thoughts 30 Days

I hope I get this challenge right- "For the next 30 days during this challenge, your task is to write down 2-3 negative thoughts you have and then flip each one with 5 positive alternatives."  This is day 1- let me see how it goes. 

-Negative Thought:
I am mad that I don't have a cellphone or have much trust in the car.  I feel stuck and helpless.

+Positive Alternatives:
It gives me the opportunity to be brave- step out and make things happen for myself. 
I will learn to be better at saving money.
It gives others the opportunity to help me. 
I am unique because I don't have a cellphone.
I can feel okayish about staying at home plus I am never tempted to look at a phone I am always paying attention to others.  

-Negative Thought:
I am disappointed in myself for not teaching my girls more about their bodies and puberty. 

+Positive Alternatives:
Now it is wide open for me to teach them and for them to teach me. 
It is going to be a learning experience for all of us.
This is a sensitive topic- at least I am worried enough about it to know that it needs to be talked about- I think I am headed in the right direction. 
I have some books to guide me. 
Don't be too hard on yourself- you are correcting it and figuring out how to do it.  

Bookworms Blog Prompt

Grab the nearest book.  Open it and go to the tenth word.  Do a Google Image Search of the word.  Write about what the image brings to mind. 

Dear Reader, 

The book that was closest to me today was the ESV Gospel of John and the 10th word was- WAS if I skip the Introduction because I usually do.  If I don't skip the introduction the 10th word is- BIOGRAPHICAL.  And just to make this a little more interesting the 10th word in the book I am currently reading which is the 3rd book in the Left Behind series called Nicolae is- DISAPPEARANCES. 

Here is the picture I got for WAS.

I guess this picture brings to mind school and all the language classes I took.  I was a bit of a slow learner and not until my Senior year did I even understand what it meant to conjugate a verb.  I don't think my French teacher was a very good teacher, but he was a fun guy.  I learned how to conjugate in Latin class though.  This picture is funny though because I don't know exactly what is going on.  Is the boy with the basketball thinking about when he was young because he sees an old lady with a walker?  I don't know.  I am a little confused.  Moving on....

The first picture I got for BIOGRAPHICAL...

This image brings to mind- BORING.  This is a boring picture.  It isn't even a picture so much as just the word spelled out on a blue background.  So I am going to put my favorite picture from the first line of the image search.

I LOVE IT!  This is so narcissistic and the first thing that come to mind about this picture is me in college.  I was so self absorbed.  I was not a very good person or a good friend for that matter.  I wasn't straight up evil or anything just completely into myself.  I had a lot to learn about life and I am so glad for how I have grown and changed- at least I think and HOPE I have.  I still have trouble with conversations and asking questions but I think I have finally made some progress.

Lastly the word DISAPPEARANCES....

I guess the first thing that comes to mind is Criminal Minds and I miss watching that show.  I am waiting to see if the next season will be available on Netflix soon.  I don't know anyone personally who has gone "missing" but I use to like reading about mysterious missing people like Amelia Earhert and watching criminal investigation shows. 

Any way that was a fun little project....but I hope I have something more interesting to write about next time because right now I haven't been doing many interesting things.  It has been pretty normal around here- do laundry, watch tv, read a book, and wash dishes and then repeat with slight variation like maybe I will read a book first and then fold the laundry. 

Hopefully the next time I write it will be a small update on how my meditations are going or on how my apple cider comes out or if I don't write for awhile it might be something from The Happiness Challenge! 

Regards,
L.L.