Advent Day 17- Belonging and Peace

"One thing done in peace will most likely be better than 10 things done in panic...I am not a hero if I deny rest; I am only tired." -Susan McHenry, author

I am piggy backing off yesterday because I spent nearly all afternoon and evening at the laundry mat or shopping.  The quote is great for the laundry mat though because of the need for peace.  This picture if from Grandpa and Kori's Christmas party.  This is their 2 year old daughter Callie.  She barely keeps still and is so adorable.  I am reminded of family and where we belong in this world.  During the holidays I don't get to see my mom and dad since starting my own family.  I do think about them and pray for them.  I reminisce often during the holidays and I am sure if your memories are happy that you do as well.  We all want to belong especially to a family that loves us.  

Advent Day 16- Poinsettia and Playing

"I hate the radio this time of year because they play "All I Want for Christmas Is You" like every other song.  And that's just not enough." -Bridger Winegar, screenwriter

This is the first official day of winter break for the kids and Christmas party at Grandpa's house.  He has babies at his house so it is so adorable so now my husband has two little half sisters- Kali and Adore.  I didn't have time to get a poinsettia this year but there was one on the bag for the present we were bringing.  Also more rejoicing that I didn't have to cook- I am starting to think I am just not into cooking as much as I use to be...hmmm a new revelation or just burnt out?  Any way- it was a fun night and filled with cousins and little ones.  

 

Advent Day 15- Rejoice!

"May your walls know joy, may every room hold laughter, and every window open to great possibility."  -Mary Anne Radmacher, author

Rejoicing because I made it to church and because I didn't have to cook dinner!  AMEN!  That is all I have to say about that. 

Advent Day 14- Hustle and Bustle and My Birthday

"Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy." -Thich Nhat Hanh, Vietnamese Buddhist Monk

Eugene Holiday Market

For my 35th birthday and our 11th year anniversary we spent the day down at Eugene.  We saw the new Star Wars movie The Last Jedi and then went to one of my favorite Christmas places ever- the Eugene Holiday market.  My husband use to sell his dad's wooden mirrors and pill boxes and hair sticks etc. here while we were dating and for about a year or two after we were married so I have fond memories.  Our girls haven't been down there since they have been grown- they were a little groggy from the movie (it was way too long IMO) but I wanted to go and it was my birthday so they had to humor me.  I bought some super cute owl earrings and ended the night with taco salad and made my own cake.  Thank goodness I am flexible and love the holidays or I might have felt a little let down, but I got my very own Harry Potter coloring book and magnet book markers AND a little Christmas owl necklace.  Also very thankful for my husband who said we didn't have to do anniversary presents or make it a big deal this year- I wouldn't have felt very up for it any way since I was almost sure I was never going to be well again (that was an exaggeration).  I will still say there is always next year even if I say it A LOT.    

Advent Day 13- Invitation (to the Manager and to Star Wars- apparently)

"I find your lack of faith disturbing." -Darth Vader

So this Star Wars thing is a big deal?  Okay, okay, I KNOW it is a big deal especially with my husband.  It is fun times.  We went to see the movie on my birthday (12/16) so I am bit behind on the pictures. I do like Star Wars just wasn't feeling it as much as 2 years ago probably because of all the illness at home (it wasn't just me who was coughing).  Also I think other moms and bloggers or just creative types who don't have a whole lot of resources might have these grand ideas of how things will play out and their imagination does not end up fitting the reality- totally me.  I wanted to maybe write a review, do my hair all Princess Leia like, and maybe make some Star Wars cookies or give some Star Wars related gifts to my kids and husband.  Nope!  Woke up at 5 am to my 8 year old crying and saying she hadn't been able to fall asleep since 1am because the pressure of her cold had spread to her ears.  It was a little panicky for me as we had already had plans but we happened to have the right medicine and she was able to get a little more sleep before we had to leave around 9:30 or 10:00.  I didn't even remember to wear my Death Star earrings or my Tie Fighter ring.  I will party on and my faith will be strong even when expectations don't get met- not even the tiny ones.  

 

Advent Day 12-Cozy

"Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmastime." -Laura Ingalls Wilder, author

 I have finally recovered from the bronchitis and school has been out for a couple days now I have some time to write and think.  Also washing machine smells like burning rubber now so that is fun- NOT.  What a season!  I haven't gone completely crazy or stressed- praise God!- but it is still annoying.  I haven't been proud about anything I have written this Advent.  I was truly trying to find time in the morning to write so I could spend more time with my husband in the evenings.  But I have to face reality for the millionth time- I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON!  At least not a thinking morning person.  Mornings are for three things for me- coffee, reading, and MAYBE a BIG MAYBE some exercise to get the blood flowing.  Three things it is NOT for- writing, rushing, and clarity of thought.  So as I take my time this afternoon while my husband is out I will say thank God he loves shopping and thank God the stressful part of Christmas is pretty much done.  I had a cozy time with my girls watching Elf.  I don't feel like cleaning any more today so I took a break from that as well- at least for one day. 

Advent Day 11- Waiting and Welcoming

"Each of us is an innkeeper who decides if there's room for Jesus." -Neal Maxwell, scholar and religious leader

We are now more than half way to Christmas!  It hasn't been great because of the bronchitis in fact it was kind of a mess.  It reminds me of the dryer fiasco of last year's Advent and the season about 3 or 4 years ago when the car broke down..  I guess it is so I can always have something to write about and a reminder of who to truly rely on.  As I was just telling a friend, "Of course something like this has to happen around the holidays!"  I guess one can expect the unexpected during Advent just like Mary who probably hadn't planned to be the Holy Mother of God so I will welcome the crazy even when it doesn't look the way I personally want it to be.  

Advent Day 10- Favorite Carols

"This is the power of gathering: it inspires us, delightfully, to be more hopeful, more joyful, more thoughtful: in a word, more alive." -Alice Waters

The gathering of singing together is amazing but especially beautiful during Christmas.  My favorite carol will always be "O Holy Night"  but I also love- "What Child is This?", "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day", "O Come, O Come Emmanuel", "Joy to the World" and "The Carol of the Bells".  I do love Christmas music, but I like variety too.  I am sure I could list many more Christmas songs I love that are not "carols".  I have even written a similar posts HERE and HERE.

Advent Day 9- The Gift of Light

"Oh, Penny.  I know you think you are being generous, but the foundation of gift giving is reciprocity.  You haven't given me a gift.  You've given me an obligation." -Sheldon Cooper, "The Big Bang Theory"

 HAPPY ST. LUCY'S DAY!

Although this prompt was not originally on St. Lucy's Day I am posting it today especially since I am only one day from finishing my regiment of antibiotics.  I am feeling so so so much better.  I even spent the day wrapping presents and cleaning a little bit.  I don't have too much to say except for how grateful I am for feeling better, for a warm home full of light and love, and for all the wrapping I got done today.  I feel as if I have been given an amazing gift of renewed health.  

Advent Day 8- Church and Vulnerability

"So God throws open the door of this world- and enters as a baby.  As the most vulnerable imaginable.  Because He wants unimaginable intimacy with you." -Ann Voskamp, author

During this Advent Season I have become the vulnerable one as well.  I couldn't get to church because of my bronchitis.  I was so exhausted from the coughing I couldn't even make it to watch my girls in the Christmas pageant and hear them singing.  I was even too tired to feel guilty about it.  My coughing was so rough that my husband took me to urgent care.  I got some medicine and now I am finally feeling relief and slept just about all through the night.  Sometimes we need to be the ones accepting the help.  A great lesson to learn during this Advent.

Advent Day 7- Bake

"Christmas is a stocking stuffed with sugary goodness." -Mo Rocca

Christmas is sugary goodness for sure!  I know this isn't a traditional Christmas cake or cookies or really anything Christmasy at all, but guess who wanted an Emoji cake for her birthday which is always near the beginning of the Advent season? Lucy's birthday turned out to be a success of sugar and fun even while mama was barely hanging on because of illness.  I picked up pizza, made the cake, and managed to tidy up- by the grace of God.  

Advent Day 6- Celebration and Prayer

"Mary, give me your Heart: so beautiful, so pure, so immaculate; your Heart so full of love and humility that I may be able to receive Jesus in the Bread of Life and love Him as you love Him in the distressing guise of the poor." -Saint Teresa of Calcutta

I needed this prayer.  I need almost any prayer during this time while struggling with a cough and my baby girl turning six.  I some how managed to clean the house, bake a cake, and put together a banner.  So I celebrated just surviving.  Thanking God for every hour of sleep I get.  Reminding me to be humble.  Sometimes you realize you are the poor that others can help.  

 

Advent Day 5- Nostalgia

"You did it! Congratulations!  World's best of cup of coffee!  Great job, everybody!  It's great to be here." -Will Ferrell, "Elf"

What is more nostalgic than children's Christmas choir?

This time of year is so busy and full.  Remember to thank teachers and choir directors and co-workers and your parents who make this time of year so special.  I remember Christmas practices when I was a kid.  I was in the "The Innkaper", "Wise Guys and Starry Skies" (I had chicken pox and didn't know it at the time but I was cook with a spoon in my hair), "Christmas at Lone Star Gulch" (I wore an old fashioned dress with little pearl buttons that was too big for me and itchy but loved it)"Not a Creature Was Stirring"( I was a black cat), and the one I remember the least "Arch the Angel".  They were chaotic.  They were fun.  They were labors of love with not a whole lot immediate rewards.  It will be a miracle when I can take the time to transfer our old VHS tapes to DVD and maybe even put them on Youtube.  Just a Christmas wish right now and I just wanted to thank all the extra helpers during this super busy time of year.  

Advent Day 4- St. Nick and Looking Forward

"This season of Advent means there is something on the horizon, the likes of which we have never seen before." -Jan L. Richardson, artist and spiritual writer

What do I look forward to at Christmas time?  I look forward to cold nights not a cold in my chest.  I l look forward to watching Christmas movies not watching myself cough up a lung.  I look forward to seeing the decorations and lights not seeing snot dripping down my nose in a blurry haze because I haven't slept for more than 3 hours at a time.  I look forward to listening to the hymns and The Messiah not listening to my whole family hacking.  So far I haven't been able to have much Christmas cheer, but with prayers and waiting and rest I believe and have faith it will come.  God gives us just what we need and apparently I needed a lot of sitting on the couch.  

Happy Birthday to my St. Nick baby girl.

Advent Day 3- Scarves and Patience

"Why is patience so important?  Because it makes us pay attention." -Paulo Coelho, author

I don't think of myself as an impatient person.  In fact, when it comes to Christmas I will happily wait.  My daughter has even said the waiting is the best part and when the day finally comes it is almost a let down.  I tend to agree.  If I lack patience it is mostly with people not the days of the week.  I get impatient when my kids don't listen.  I get impatient waiting in line.  I get impatient with myself for being so sinful and wretched and messing up and forgetting and being lazy and getting sick.  If you were wondering why I am posting day 3 of Advent when it is already day 10 well I have been coughing up a storm and my husband took me to urgent care.  I was diagnosed with bronchitis. I have only finally started feeling normal.  So be patient with me...now you have to pay attention...haha- but seriously learning to have patience with myself is the toughest but it is just as important as the patience for Christmas.    

Advent Day 2-Hope

"Let nothing disturb you, nothing frighten you, all things are passing, God is unchanging.  Patience gains all; nothing is lacking to those who have God: God alone is sufficient." -St. Teresa of Avila

It is a good thing that God alone is sufficient because I still seem to be having a nasty cough and the stress of the season is already getting to me.  The words bills and budget and money suck the hope and joy right out of me.  I need to pray.  I need to take this a little at a time.  I don't know how other people do it, but I have to do it the way I was created to do it.  Take out the fear replace it with hope. 

Advent Day 1- Wreath

"Waiting is an art that our impatient age has forgotten.  It wants to break open the ripe fruit when it has hardly finished planting the shoot."

-Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Theologian

Advent has begun.  Advent- the season of waiting for the arrival of a notable person, thing, or event- in this case remembering Christ coming as a baby to set into motion the salvation of mankind.  I love this waiting time.  I love this waiting time more than Christmas itself- true and honest. 

I have always been a very slow starter and pretty oblivious to say the least.  This year as I look around it is harder and harder to see the waiting part.  Almost immediately after Thanksgiving I saw at least 10 Christmas trees posted on my Facebook feed and a handful of Christmasy things being done.  I am not upset or concerned, but I am curious and a little surprised.  I feel inadequate because I like the waiting part and the slowness of putting out a couple things at a time not the immediate rush to decorate all things Christmas.  I begin by setting out the Advent candles and putting a few extra candles in my kitchen window sill.  Next week I will be lucky enough if my house stays clean to put out the mugs and kitschy decor.  The week after that will come the tree.  The week after that maybe a few things like baking and going to see the lights.  I guess I just do Christmas slowly and I don't want to feel bad about that. 

End of Summer, Start of School

Dearest Reader,

All children are officially in school.  I have missed writing to you so much!  Summer was fun and full, but also busy and I barely got to read AT ALL.  Between camping trips, the heat, not being able to read in the car, Eclipse 2017 across America, and all the paperwork involved in registering 3 kids for school I have been feeling officially wiped out. 

I am at the library right now and I get to sit in a place that is NOT the children's section.  I could get use to this, but I am most likely not going to complete my Popsugar reading goal unless they are picture books *shrugs* although I am not giving up- I am going to keep on reading just not looking like I will actually complete my intended goal. 

Some pictures to end summer:  I was able to do #25 Watch the Sunset which is perfect for the end of summer and I can not tell you how excited I am about rain on Sunday!!!!!  After all the fire news here, we could use a good soak. 

I don't have a great viewing area.  This is outside our house.  I needed a quick break but someone followed me!  Oh well, that's mom life.  Praise God for the beautiful sky and the sun AND the rain (coming soon). 

This next week...will be.....the first...FULL week...of school for the girls!!!!  The house is getting clean- inch by slow inch- hopefully it will not be destroyed over the weekend.  My husband graciously encouraged me to focus on house projects rather than finding a job right away.  I am so happy about this.  I felt I was living a little bit on pins and needles trying to approach the subject.  Maybe it is a little selfish but I get to focus more on the Happiness Challenge and my reading and writing. 

It really is a good life.  I may complain from time to time about lack of money, low self esteem because of weight, awkward social skills, miscommunication with spouse and children, but I know God and I have love and faith and hope in Christ that can not be broken.  This is just the beginning of a new chapter with Him. 

So back to the Happiness Challenge...it looks like (#26) Send someone you miss a postcard is next and I found so many postcards while I was cleaning I think I will be sending more than one.  It looks do able for sure.  I will send YOU a postcard if I know who you are and you can send me an email of your address (langsather@gmail.com).  It would be fun to get mail that wasn't a bill.

Yours truly,
L.L.  

Half Way Point Summer 2017

Dearest Reader,

Well....here we are.  I just wanted to send you a quick note because I love you and I want to let you know I am alive.  I have been busy but....mostly busy being lazy!  I have been to Women's Camp, a funeral, a concert, and been binge watching Mad Men and Criminal Minds.  None of these things were Happiness Challenge specific- especially not the funeral which was one of the hardest things I have had to witness.  It was for a friend's 6 year old little boy who was killed by a semi-truck.  An unimaginable, parent's worst nightmare situation.  To be honest, I have been a little angry with God over it.  Every time I think about it my eyes swell with tears.  I also did not come here to write about that, though I wish I could say SOMETHING, ANYTHING to make the ache and pain and fear and anger go away for those hurting from this. 

No, I came to say I am behind on a handful of goals and that life is precious...soak it up.  I wish I could hug each and everyone of you and tell you personally how much you matter.  Any way, I will keep this short and end here.

Love,

L.L.

Summer 2017 Official Beginning

Dearest Reader,

What...a...trip!  I was so stressed and full of anxiety and nerves that I haven't been "happy" enough to count anything on my Happiness Challenge although technically I did a bunch of stuff during this trip I am not going to count it.  My stomach was mostly in knots the whole time and it didn't end exactly well but overall it was an excellent trip.

We started off in John Day.  My husband ran a soccer camp/VBS.  I didn't feel very helpful but it was beautiful out there and hot.  It was also a wonderful bonding time with awesome people.  I didn't have to cook so that was great.  

My husband did amazing by the way!  My kids did pretty well, but were not much into soccer.

After John Day we went to visit my parents.  You might find I have a lack of pictures of my parents- oops- I bet my mom has some.  We haven't visited in a long time.  We haven't done it in nearly 10 years.  We aren't exactly rolling in dough and getting time off is not exactly a cake walk.  But we are thankful for the time we do get. 

Here are some random pictures from various things we did.

My mom cooked some amazing food.  My dad had fun having the kids around though he got a little sick near the end of our time together.  My brother gave the kids fidget spinners!  That is a good uncle.  My sister came around to hang out and bought s'more stuff- yum.  So it was good.

How has the start of your summer been?  I need to get back into reading and writing and finding my Happiness- btw the car made it!

Yours truly,

L.L.