Ashes

 "Ash Wednesday is full of joy...The source of all sorrow is the illusion that of our selves we are anything but dust." -Thomas Merton

Today is Ash Wednesday and you know what that means!  I am reborn from the ashes and I get to fast, pray, and give wholly of myself!  Lent felt like it was a long time in coming for me.  I think I have been waiting since early February, but God's timing is always right so I was patient but I also prepared.  Let me tell you what I am doing this year.  

Mornings- I will be playing Lent Madness again!  I haven't really participated since 2017.  But I am really in a good mood to read about the Saints and maybe pre-order a mug while I am at it.  I have a feeling Origen will be the winner of the Golden Halo but I still haven't filled out my bracket yet.  

Afternoons- I will be reflecting or reading on recommended books from Lent Ideas from Rachel Held Evans.  I miss her so much.  Her spiritual guidance challenged me and gave me so much to think about.  During one of these Lententides I would love to read all her books, but these are the ones I will be reading this year:

I am looking forward to  all of these books and I keep praying that I am not trying to overdo it.  

Evenings- will be focusing on the A Common Meal Devotional and participating in Eat Rice & Beans during Lent.  This will be brand new for us.  I am not entirely sure how it will go over and we will not really be able to start until tomorrow because of Youth Group at our house on Wednesdays, but I am looking forward to making meal time a little simpler even though I am anticipating some complaining from the family.  

In the in between times I will continue with Busted Halo Lent Calendar and Instalent Photos, which I might only post on Instagram once or twice a week as I have been reflecting on the question "Is it necessary/helpful for me to share the nature of my fast with other or should I keep it to myself?"  I am afraid I may be getting a spirit of pride when it comes to observing Lent.  I am going to keep the photo posts to a minimum on other social media accounts but I will post most of them here for my own personal enjoyment and to keep as memories.  I know I don't have many readers, if any, except myself so I won't have to worry about checking every 5 minutes to see if I got a "like".  

Today I was privileged to be able to receive the ashes at St. Boniface church in Sublimity, OR.  I was not sure I would be able to make it to any type of service this year, not just because of COVID (although the mask restrictions are being lifted, soon, I hear) but  because since the beginning of the school year we open up our home on Wednesday nights to our Youth Group.  But as God so blesses it was a Late Start Wednesday which meant I could go to an early mass before school started at 9:30.  My eyes tear up whenever we say the words "Lord, I am not worth that you should enter under my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed."  I know I am not Catholic and technically can not even take communion, but my soul feels these words and knows Jesus is there while I weep and wipe his feet with my tears and dry them with my hair.  I am so blessed and grateful for this yearly journey.  I love how it looks the same but also different every year.  BTW this was the most smudgiest ash I have ever received- it doesn't look like a cross at all!  See above for picture!

Pray for me as I fast today.  It has been a bit more difficult than some years today.  I have been drinking lots of tea and I have had my one meal for the day already: rice and beans with avocado toast so now I pray I will not be tempted by the food for the Youth Group.  

I absolutely love this time of year and can't wait to dive into all that God has to offer.  

Happy Lententide!